The Bush administration is ending. If Bush & Co. didn't entirely wreck the place, it was for no lack of trying. George himself achieved astonishing depths of failure. His most notable achievements were all unintentional, and he still doesn't know what they were.
Here's the biggest one: Although the American people have been fed a diet of cynical disinformation about government for the last half-century or more, the Bush years re-taught millions of them that voting is important, that established parties aren't identical, that primaries are a mechanism for assessing and refining candidates, and that campaign speeches don't have to consist entirely of hot air and patriotic-sounding generalities.
There will be histories written about the Bush administration. They'll be privy to information we don't have yet, because the future is like that. On the other hand, we have our own privileged knowledge: We know how the story looked like to people who didn't know how it was going to come out.
Now, in this moment before a changing world overwrites our memories of the era, let us pause to salute our constant companion of those years: The Onion. Other histories of the Bush years will doubtless be more factual, but none will ever be truer.
January 26, 2000: Bush Reaches Out To Hispanic Community With Generous Tip.
March 8, 2000: Bush 'Refuses To Dignify' Mass-Murder Allegations.
July, 26, 2000: Bush Reluctantly Accepts Donation From Parents.
August 9, 2000: Republicans' 'Diversity Through Imported Africans' Plan Criticized.
September 13, 2000: Bush Surges Ahead In Polls After Strong Showing On Pommel Horse.
October 4, 2000: Bush Vows To Do 'That Thing Gore Just Said, Only Better'.
October 18, 2000: Bush Horrified To Learn Presidential Salary.
November 15, 2000: Bush Executes 253 New Mexico Democrats.
November 15, 2000: Nation Plunges Into Chaos: Pro-Bush Rebels Seize Power In West; D.C. In Flames.
November 15, 2000: Serbia Deploys Peacekeeping Forces To U.S.
December 20, 2000: Bush Calls For End To 'Era Of Political Argument'.
January 17, 2001: Bush: 'Our Long National Nightmare Of Peace And Prosperity Is Finally Over'.
January 24, 2001: '80s Retro Craze Sweeps Executive Branch.
April 18, 2001: Bush Regales Dinner Guests With Impromptu Oratory On Virgil's Minor Works.
May 9, 2001: After Careful Consideration, Bush Recommends Oil Drilling.
May 30, 2001: Bush Actually President, Nation Suddenly Realizes.
June 20, 2001: Bush Trying To Decide How To Spend His Tax Refund"
July 18, 2001: Bush Vows To Remove Toxic Petroleum From National Parks.
August 1, 2001: Bush Finds Error In Fermilab Calculations.
August 22, 2001: Bush Vows To Wipe Out Prescription-Drug Addiction Among Seniors.
September 26, 2001: American Life Turns Into Bad Jerry Bruckheimer Movie.
September 26, 2001: Hijackers Surprised To Find Selves In Hell.
September 26, 2001: God Angrily Clarifies 'Don't Kill' Rule.
September 26, 2001: Hugging Up 76,000 Percent.
September 26, 2001: Arab-American Third-Grader Returns From Recess Crying, Saying He Didn't Kill Anyone.
September 26, 2001: Not Knowing What Else To Do, Woman Bakes American-Flag Cake.
September 26, 2001: Bush Sr. Apologizes To Son For Funding Bin Laden In '80s.
September 26, 2001: Report: Gen X Irony, Cynicism May Be Permanently Obsolete.
September 26, 2001: Jerry Falwell: Is That Guy A Dick Or What?
September 26, 2001: The U.S. Military Is Pondering Its Response Options.
September 26, 2001: Talking To Your Child About The WTC Attack.
September 26, 2001: U.S. Vows To Defeat Whoever It Is We're At War With.
September 26, 2001: President Urges Calm, Restraint Among Nation's Ballad Singers.
September 26, 2001: Statshot: How Have We Spent the Last Two Weeks?
September 26, 2001: Dinty Moore Breaks Long Silence On Terrorism With Full-Page Ad.
September 26, 2001: Point/Counterpoint: We Must Retaliate With Blind Rage…
September 26, 2001: Infographic: Making America Safer.
October 3, 2001: U.S. Urges Bin Laden To Form Nation It Can Attack.
October 10, 2001: Freedoms Curtailed In Defense Of Liberty.
November 14, 2001: U.S. To Arab World: 'Stop Hating Us Or Suffer The Consequences'.
December 5, 2001: America Is Ready To Laugh At Me Again.
December 19, 2001: What Is Sexy In The Wake Of Sept. 11?
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